Monday 14 April 2014

Autism Acceptance Month and #HAWMC Day 14!

Well that’s just crazy! What’s the most ridiculous thing you've heard about
your health condition? Was there any context? What did you think at the
time you heard it – and what do you think of it now?

I've heard A LOT of ridiculous things about Autism Spectrum Disorder. Especially when regarding my 
attempts at finding a re-diagnosis. You see, when I was little ,my pediatrician diagnosed me with PDD-NOS 
as well as a few other label-y type things, so I thought it would be easy to re-aquire now much needed papers. (All originals perished by fire when I was small, and my pediatrician has long since passed away. This is one heck of a journey I've set myself up for!)

Here are some of the comments I've had to butt heads with so far, some from Doctors, some from family, some from friends and some from people I don't even know.
YOU CAN'T BE AUTISTIC! YOU....... 
-wear makeup! 
-dress like a girl.
-smell good.
-suck at math!
-A GIRL! 
-are too emotional to be autistic.
-don't mean AUTISM autism? You must be an Ass Burger right?  *spelling intended*
-are making it up.
-don't scream, flap or rock.
-are smart!
-TALK!
-like people.
-look fine to me.
-are just looking for attention! man, thats low.
-are just a little bit of an introvert, you just need to get out more, you wanna go have a drink?
-are so normal! I never would have guessed, you look just fine!
-hug people, aren't Autistic people supposed to be , like , devoid of emotion and stuff?

From my doctor: Its all in your head, its because you're depressed because you're FAT. Lose some weight!You'll feel so much better, instead of eating big meals , just grab a handful of trail mix. Just don't eat so much.You're not an Autistic, I've never heard of a female having it anyway.
**for those who don't know me, I AM a curvy girl and I always have been, I'm cool with that and eat very mindfully to maintain my health**
Long story short, Doctor put me on meds that took me to a faraway dark place that I wasn't comfy with, so I quit taking the meds, and FIRED that doctor, I don't need that kind of BULL-ony in my life! 

Here are my thoughts on the silly things people have said:
wear makeup
-I do wear makeup, its like warpaint for me to go out into a very hostile world. It helps me fit in stealthily.
dress like a girl
-I am a girl, therefore am capable of dressing howEVER the heck I want! Usually the deciding factor is how
soft and comfortable the clothing is. Some days its dresses, some days its jeans.
smell good
-Duh, I bathe, just like everyone else. Though it is well known that some children with ASD don't enjoy 
showering, its a huge assault on the sensory chart. I, happen to love showering etc. 
suck at math
- Nope, I'm not good at math, or computers! I AM however an amazing artist! I can create like nobody's business, for hours or days at a time. Everyone has something that they are good at , however, not all people on spectrum have savant capabilities.
are a girl
-Yes, I am a woman on spectrum, first off, the media would have you think that kids are the only ones being affected by Autism at the moment. What they fail to say is the fact that litterally any person you happen to meet on any given day may have autism :)  Autism does not discriminate between age, gender association, race, religion, height or anything like that. I know many people on spectrum right from a three year old boy, to an almost 70 year old woman!
are too emotional to be autistic.
- I am emotional, because I feel the world in a different way than you do. Last summer , I stepped on a tiny toad and killed it by accident. D: I cried, I couldn't help it. I know it may sound odd ,but HB and I toasted the silly little toad and said good things of the departing kind. I am emotional, and I definitely feel things WAY more hardcore than most people. Memories that happen sometimes feel absolutely real, and I'm totally crying right now because I accidentally killed a fekkin' toad ... ... . ahg.  
don't mean AUTISM autism? You must be an Ass Burger right?  *spelling intended*
-yes, AUTISM autism, its a very broad spectrum,and no, I don't have Aspergers, very funny though, I've NEVER heard that joke before.
are making it up.
-I dare you to live with me for a week and see me at home where I am purely myself , and tell me I'm making it up. Better yet, go have coffee with my Husband. He'll let you off the hook and just tell you how silly that sounds to him, the one who sees me everyday, and helps me in more ways than I can count. <3
don't scream, flap or rock.
-Actually, you're right on the screaming, I would scare the sh*t out of myself by making such an awful noise.
However , again, spend a week with me where I'm not trying to suppress or pass as absolutely normal, or just ACTUALLY pay attention, I stim a lot. And flapping and rocking is only the beginning of a long list of motor stims that I do in a day, I've also had 29 years experience at living in this world, I can hide most telltale signs of Autism for great lengths of time, however there is a kickback that I have to be prepared for. 
SOCIAL HANGOVER, my recovery time after passing in public is significantly longer than that of average introverts.
are smart!
-wow, that , was just rude. Yes , many if not most Autistic people are smart, most more than the person who made this comment! Even if a person doesn't communicate by conventional method, doesn't mean they aren't absorbing EVERYTHING around them :) Some are total GENIUSES! 
TALK!
- Um, yea? Sure , some people with Autism don't speak, but SO so many do :) Even those who don't speak with their mouths often find other very effective ways of communicating! Text to speech devices and sign language are just two examples ! 
like people.
-well sure I like people,don't you? I just do better in smaller groups or one on one. I have many friends and family that I care about, and I do like seeing them all, just not all at once!
look fine to me
-Sure I look fine, there's nothing ''wrong'' with me, I am Autistic, I don't have the plague. 
are just looking for attention, man thats low.
-Oh , yea, because this is such a fun thing to do! Jumping and covering my ears when loud unexpected sounds happen, being socially awkward, losing my voice when I get stressed out and upset  etc etc etc are soooo much fun, and totally don't make me feel like the blue sheep in a herd of cows. Geeze louize.
are just a little bit of an introvert, you just need to get out more, you wanna go have a drink?
-I am an introvert, that comes with the territory of being me, I get out plenty! I love being outside, and no thank you, I don't much like going to bars. I don't mind going dancing sometimes but I have to wear ear plugs and sit a while to get used to the moving lights, I have a tendancy to bash into things or fall over.. 
are so normal! I never would have guessed, you look just fine!
-Ok? thanks? Thats ok that you never guessed, I never told you or showed you, and again,, I don't have the plague...
hug people, aren't Autistic people supposed to be , like , devoid of emotion and stuff?
- Again, see the emotion part up there? I just feel things differently, and as for the hugging thing?
It really depends who wants a hug, how I'm feeling on a particular day, and whether a person asks me before hugging me. This all goes for any type of touching based socialization.
ALWAYS ASK FIRST! This really should go for anyone, there are very few people I enjoy hugs from and only one person in the world that I am ok with hugging me absolutely anytime :)
**I have actually punched someone in the face when they tackle hugged me from behind, I felt terrible, but they took me by total surprise and I couldn't tell who it was at the time..**

Ok! This post is getting WAY too long, so to sum it all up, take what the media tells you with a salt shaker
, if you have questions about Autism, I have some great sites in my references section and a number of good books listed! Or, you can ask me, or any other adult open about their Autism, most of us wont mind answering any questions you may have.
 Just remember to be kind, EVERYONE IS BEAUTIFULLY UNIQUE X)

And that is why Autism acceptance month is something I chose to participate in this year, because if we don't talk about it, how will you know?
Thanks for putting up with all this wordy-ness! O.O Holy Cats what  long post!

Love and a Spoon
<3 (___)=========

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